Shaving and Skin.

So for my birthday I shaved.  I shaved my face and my whole body.  It took a long time.  But it was worth it.  I felt pretty.  I really wish I had softer skin.  And there are ways that I can achieve this if I started on hormone therapy, but that is a scary proposition.  There are some things I want to experience, but there are side effects I don’t want.  It would be really cool to have softer skin, less hair, breasts and even experiencing the womanly cycle would be cool.  It would make me really experience what I want to be, to really feel feminine and beautiful.  But there are side effects such as my boy parts getting smaller and eventually that leads to having surgury which I am not sure that I want. 

I am still in the begining stages of discovering who I am, but there is always lots of pondering. I really want softer skin and better hair.  And I try to use products that make that happen.  I really hate how quickly my facial hair grows.  It seems that everytime I turn around I am having to shave so that I can feel secure when I look in the mirror.  One day I think I will see the face that I want to see.

I did have a realization a few weeks ago when I gave a girl friend some girl advice.  It really made me feel great and feminine and it awoke within me a realization that everything is largely on the inside.  It is all about how I feel.  The other stuff is just tools to help me awaken that feeling within myself.  I can feel like a girl.  That is what is inside.  Wearing panties and dresses is exquisite, but it is on the inside that I show what I really am.  That is where Noely really lives.  I do want to have breasts though.  I would atleast like some fake breasts so that when I wear a bra there is not an emptieness there, sure it is an emptiness, that only I feel, but still it is there. 

I’m sure I will get there.  I’m sure I will figure out what I need.  I’m sure I will discover who I am completely.  I hope you are discovering yourself too.  I hope that you are happy.  And I hope that you know that you are loved. 

Love, Always,




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